Daily Archives: December 4th, 2010

The light of hope shines on Negativity

For every positive there is a negative and that negative is me

I got up early this morning to do some work in the front yard putting up our festive “negativity scene” creche. While taking a little break, though, something happened…

Every once in a blue moon the internet can wash up on your shore a little piece of flotsam that really makes your day.

“An Australian psychology expert who has been studying emotions has found being grumpy makes us think more clearly.

In contrast to those annoying happy types, miserable people are better at decision-making and less gullible, his experiments showed.”

ZOMG! Yes oh yes oh yes oh yes!

To the guru of negativity I hope you have listened, hmmm.

So, long story short, I went to stumbleupon and narcissisticly searched for “shout abyss.” One of the coincidental results on the first page was an article from the BBC entitled “Feeling grumpy ‘is good for you” – even though the article had nothing to do with me. Now that is what I call the universe working overtime! It’s almost spooky. Connect those dots, universe!

Negative moods trigger more attentive, careful thinking, paying greater attention to the external world.
— Professor Joe Forgas

According to the article, “sadder people were also less likely to make rash decisions or those based on racial or religious beliefs and made fewer mistakes when recalling a past event.”

It’s always fulfilling to get confirmation of something you knew all along. In fact, that sort of thing is somewhat of a disturbing positive development. I’ll have to work hard to shake this off and get back to my roots.

A series of Negativity Embracement and Integration Seminars are planned. Watch for them online soon, that is if I can make this damn computer work.

First ever Abyss Contest

To celebrate this post, I’d like to try something new here in the abyss. Our first ever photo contest! Yeah!

Subject: Negativity Scene

Interpret the subject as you wish. Perhaps make a statement about the over-commercialization of the Christmas holiday. Whatever. Be creative, think outside the box. What do you think a “negativity scene” would look like?

Submit your photographs as comments to this post. (Or links to your favorite photo sharing site.)

Prize

One winner will be selected and will win the Grand Prize – A self-inking rubber stamp that reads, in two colors (blue and red): “Past Due.” And what could be more negative than that!

Have fun and good luck!

You Have Mouth and I Must Scream

The modern era. As a people we know one thing for sure. We’re the best civilization this planet has ever seen. Hells ya.

And, by no small coincidence, we are the #1 “hey look at me” civilization of all time.

Seriously. Right now. Stop reading this and look at me. I mean it.

It used to be vanity books but that took way too much damn effort. These days it’s as easy as pie. Web sites, twitter, facebook, cell phones, and more, all give voice to a generation that screams, “Hey, look at me!” Hell, there are even some asshole pontificating bloggers who want you to read what they have to say as if they are interesting. (Hey! Don’t look at me that way!)

Naturally just putting out your wit and wisdom for the world to enjoy is usually not quite enough. Not by a long shot. After all, some folks might decide to not listen and/or not pay attention. What the devil should be done about that? Being ignored is unacceptable.

This is where our good, good friend “interrupting” rides in to save the day. Oh yeah.

The principle behind this is simple: Whatever I have to say is of Ultimate Importance and whatever you have to say is just a bunch of bullshit hot air.

You might even say this is the prime directive of our modern era. No doubt it is one of the most basic building blocks of a society that consists solely of assholes.

Let’s try a real life example. Pretend you are doing what you do best, talking about yourself and the painstakingly detailed minutia of your day, yet the other party tries to speak and interject a thought. What should you do?

Interrupt them, that’s what! Forcefully and with malice. Think of it as a conversation beheading.

Most of the time your audacious efforts at interrupting will win the day and the other party will submit. Sometimes, though, this won’t work. After all, they are most likely trying to simultaneously be as big of an asshole as you. They probably think they are important (like a special and unique snowflake) and expect your world to revolve around what they have to say.

What then?

Well, if interrupting is good, then even more interrupting is even better! Re-interrupt them. And, here’s the key strategy: Do it louder!

It’s amazing how effective a simple technique like raising your voice can be. This will shut down all but the most hardy of verbal opponents (aka your audience).

I’ve personally seen masters of this at work. Watching two black belt interrupters go at it can be fascinating. But don’t forget to bring your ear plugs! Sometimes the increase in volume can get intense enough to cause hearing loss.

The moment when one of the sparring beasts finally backs down can be one of the most spectacular as ever seen in nature. Even Mutual of Omaha hasn’t properly captured it on film yet. One party is victorious and the other submits and goes into a mode known as, “Whatever, fuckhead. You think I’m going to listen to you???”

I  bet if you hone your powers of observation you just might be able to witness this phenomenon as you go throughout your day.

For those of you ready to take things to the next level, to be world-class interrupters, here is a special web site just for you. Now go out there and seize the say!

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