Tag Archives: walking tall

Walking Short

I was wondering: Is it possible to pinpoint the exact moment when someone who was previously hardcore loses their ball sack? My working theory is that it has to do with starring in a Disney movie or being the voice for an overly cutesy cartoon character.

Let’s use Dwayne Johnson as an example. Sure he started out as some sort of cartoonish wrestling character, but eventually he became successful enough to pull down some “bad ass” roles in movies. I actually really liked his performance in “Walking Tall” where he grabbed a stick of lumber and cleaned up a town. Back then he had wood. It was believable. He chewed up the screen on that one.

Following up that performance, though, is “Race to Witch Mountain” and “Tooth Fairy.” Woosh! There went the ball sack and all the cred he so carefully built. 🙂

Steve Martin is someone else who lost his edge. Back in the day he was wearing rabbit ears and an arrow through the head and was joking about his “girlfriend’s pussy.” (The punchline: That cat was the best fuck I ever had.) Somewhere between that joke and “Cheaper By The Dozen” he totally lost it. Ball sack misplaced. Now he’s merely a multi-talented renaissance man that drives the ladies wild, but at what cost? He’s lost the edge that got him started.

Who else falls into this phenomenon? Eddie Murphy I think. Who else? I know one thing. Not Adam Sandler. He never had it. But I’ll bet there are lots of others who did and have since lost it. And I don’t blame them. If I was offered that kind of money for my ball sack I’d gobble it up, too.