Facebook With Mom
A lot of people ask me, “Hey, asshole. Where do you get your blogging topics?” Good question. Using today as an example, I had an early morning Facebook chat with mom. Later, I decided to write about it. See? That’s how it’s done. -Ed.
I don’t use the Facebook a lot. It’s mainly for poking. And, way less often, liking. I’ve been patiently waiting for the HATE button. I’d settle for DISLIKE. Maybe then I’d use it more.
For me, the primary purpose of Facebook is that it’s a place to post selfies I’ve taken during urban riots when I’m standing atop overturned police cars that are on fire. With my shirt off.
Other than that I have little use for the thing.
Then there’s mom. You respond to a message from mom at your own peril.
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Two guys were sitting around shooting the shit. Let us not play games and pretend that they were friends. Let’s just call them Ssob and Carp. Yes, clever anagrams that totally obscure any possible meaning. Yes, weird names. Apparently their moms didn’t like them.
One said to the other, “You know what? We should form a company. Together I bet we should be able to make money.” They agreed that sounded like a pretty good idea.
Ssob said, “It won’t work if we are equal, though. Too many tie votes. Nothing will get ever done. What we need is a person who can break all ties. I’ll be that person. My votes will be worth 80 percent and yours will be worth 20.”
Carp’s eyes narrowed and he warily glanced at Ssob. Things were already starting to flow downhill and we all know what that means.
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20 Questions and Shouts from the Abyss have a head-on collision (reblog)
The other day blogdramedy was nice enough to ass me twenty questions. It’s a meme thing going around like a case of the measles.
I, of course, was only too happy to comply. We all know I can’t turn down a challenge.
She was a good host, so I hope you’ll stop by and not only check out the post featuring yours truly, but spend a little time and explore the rest of her blog. She is not just a blogger. She’s an entertainer. She got game.
Of my friend, I can only say this: of all the souls I have encountered in my travels, hers is the most… human. (No insult intended.)
There’s this thing happening all across the Internet and I got caught up in the backwash. It’s called “20 Questions” and the name speaks for itself. It’s kind of like truth or dare but without the dare…and maybe the word “stretch” should be in there somewhere ’cause I suspect not one of the answerees were totally truthful in their responses. Because, where’s the humor in truth? We all know that a slight twist in the tale makes for a better story. I’ll take a good laugh over the truth any day. Have you not been watching the Republican debates?
Oh, and apparently Obama thinks I’m worth a laugh or two. You’ll have to click over to blogdramedy’s blog to find out more.