My organization asked me to select a vendor, conduct negotiations, and secure their services. To that end I put on a suit and tie. I also washed myself. (With soap this time.) This was important.
Naturally I selected a slick company that was “unparalleled” and the “world’s best” at what they did. I was connected with a sales person. We did a little dance.
I filed reports with the CEO about what I learned. He got back to me. He was going with my recommendation.
Oh, shit.Company credit card in hand, I inked the contract. I was then directed to the company’s website to open our shiny new account.
ERROR. (See right.)
Every journey begins with a single step. Each step is an interval where you can be screwed. Enjoy the journey.
“Thanks for choosing ACME Velociraptors Inc. LTD Corp.,” said the salesperson who was now my close personal friend. “I’ll give you a call on Monday to go over implementation.” He even bade me, “Have a nice weekend.”
It’s now Monday. I’m literally stunned that he didn’t call. Am I supposed to wait three days before I call him? I don’t want to look desperate. Oh, forget it. I already emailed him a couple hours ago. He hasn’t called back.
Where did I go wrong? I thought he liked me.
This is one bump in the road too many. Suddenly I don’t feel so good. This is a bad omen, man. This does not portend well. Beware the bodes of business.
Is he born of a jackal or is that me? I’m new to this shit.
There’s a crap for that. Stick a pitchfork me. I’m done. Well done. By Satan himself.
The future’s so blight I gotta dig graves. A pitchfork works well for that, right?
So, technology. Let’s talk about that. It’s here. It has landed on our chests like a motherfucking elephant in a COPD commercial. Let me posit this: How’s that technology working out for you?
In a moment I’m going to share my ideas regarding the three-pronged attack on our very existence by technology. (Get it? Pitchfork?) I used to think there was only one prong but that was before spring break. I’ve since expanded my thinking (as well as something else).
Call it my Grand Unification Theory of Technology (GUTT) if you will. It’s time for a gut check. Spoiler alert: Mine has been spilled open by a pitchfork. Dammit. They let anyone own these things.
It’s time to stick ’em with the prongy end. Make the jump and I’ll get to the point.
Ever get a response to a request for help that proves the person on the other end didn’t take the time or effort to actually read what you wrote? That can be frustrating.
This time it happened at WordPress Support. I’m a big fan of WordPress and quite pleased to be on their platform, but I cannot tell a lie. Their response to my request for help sucked.
The other day ALL of the images on my blog just up and disappeared. It freaked me out a bit since I have no backups (dumb) and some of them are irreplaceable one of a kind originals. (Ha!) I had recently uploaded and deleted one image in the Media area, so I thought that might have something to do with it. Frantic, I sent a support request and received the following reply:
Subject: [WordPress #nnnnnn]: Media – All images missing
From: Xxxxx – WordPress.com (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Sent: Wed 1/0X/10 3:07 PM
To: shoutabyss at live dot com
> I did: Uploaded an image to media. I then deleted that image.
> I saw: All my images disappear.
> I expected: Please tell me you backup my images. I don’t have other
What’s the image in question? If you delete an image from your Media Library you can’t get it back.
By the way, that “I did, I saw, I expected” crap is theirs, not mine. Apparently they had to revert to a template like that based on the average bear who contacts them. I love being treated based on the lowest common denominator.
So, was I not clear enough? “All images missing” in the subject line seems pretty freakin’ simple. Then in the body I grammatically point out: “All my images disappear.”
The response was so quickly received that I was stunned. I think it was something like only 30 minutes or so. That is unheard of. But what they had to say indicates they only read part of what I had written and they offered no actual comment, insight, or solution regarding my actual problem. They also completely ignored the second part of my request which was a question about backups.
Luckily my images started working a short time later and I moved on and didn’t pursue the crappy response any further. Apparently it was just some sort of temporary WordPress glitch. Here’s hoping I never have to contact them again.