What a magnificent experience. Truly technology was a great thing.
Suddenly my workout was interrupted by the outside world utilizing the direct access to my brain I had so thoughtfully provided.
Beep. Beep. Bzzt.
“Siri,” I panted. “What was that?”
My blog may be an expert authority on poop but I do try to keep it classy, ya know?
Blogger Tip: A forgotten point in yesterday’s post becomes the launch point for a new post today. FTW!
So yeah, yesterday I left out a key point that probably changed the flavor of the whole thing. Well, maybe not flavor, but you know what I mean. I’m going to literally pick things up right where we left off.
And that’s the point of today’s article. I’m going to take you on a firsthand tour of the complicated world of small office politics, protocols, mores, values and norms. Just think of me as your very own amateur poop sociologist.
As you might imagine, in a small office little grotesqueries can become big problems if left untreated. That’s why they need to go to the treatment plant. It’s natural for humans to come up with way to cope in the face of unimaginable horrors.
Most of us have the sense to know not to do certain things. We instinctively feel with our gut, much like Captain Kirk, when something is bad form. But then again, some of us don’t. This post is directed at them.
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My therapist told me today that I am prone to hyperbole. I was shocked. By about a million percent. Oh the unmitigated gall.
The unmitigated sea gall!
Now that I’m back to writing my posts on a real computer and not on an iPod I can do fancy things like include images. The preceding paragraph is, in my humble opinion, enough justification to allow insertion of a photo I took. By the way, despite my lame joke, the photo does not depict a “sea gull.” There’s no such thing. There are only “gulls.” (This is fancy marine biologist knowledge.) The Livingston on the right is a “western gull.” So just remember, when someone says “sea gull” be sure to tell them, “There’s no such thing!” I’m sure they’ll thank you for it.
I took the photo of the sea gull on my vacation*. (This is where, somehow, I tie this post back to the subject line.) I didn’t have a computer with me. Only my wee little iPod which I used to stress test my finger on a very regular basis. (Driving was also good for this.)
Now, technically speaking, a mere insignificant iPod doesn’t actually have a “Siri” inside of it. But it does have the same voice. So let me pretend a moment, won’t you?
From the title of this post, “Siri Says,” you might be thinking this post is going to be one of those cutesy explorations of the wacky things people say to their handheld gadgets and the oh-so hilarious ways the gadgets respond. Well, you’re wrong. Siri herself told me that people who do that are officially ready for their lobotomies and I’ve already had mine!
During the 42 hour drive to our vacation destination I wrote a song, a touching little ditty about poop, and recorded it on my iPod. I was planning to make it the second audio post in Shouts From The Abyss history.
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