It was a suicide mission. I knew that going in.

I volunteered.

That’s the way I like it. Long odds against … well, impossible odds.

I made my time (sic) and said my goodbyes. “Goodbye, iPod. Goodbye, iMac. Goodbye, iPad. Goodbye, Apple TV.” I’m only human so I brought the iPad with me. I knew we would make a fine Thelma & Louise moment together.

I was going to that McDonalidzed experience at the strip mall where they make eyeglasses. What the hell, you can only die once.

I made sure to bring my blue pen. We were decidedly heading out past the point of no return.

I squinted and turned to face my destiny. I took that warm feeling spreading through my pants as a sign I was doing the right thing.
Continue reading →