Who’s Sheetin’ Who?!
Let’s Do It Kroc-Style: Boom Like That!
History is written by the victors.
–Winston S. Churchill
I have this personal pet theory. It goes a little something like this:
What do I mean by this? It’s time for a tale of hungry dogs, drowning by garden hose, buxom secretaries, altered birth certificates and who’s car is parked next door.
San Diego Chargers Playoff Picks
Any team responsible for this will enjoy success in the NFL. Strike that. Reverse it. Commitment to ex-lax.
Sure, football is stupid, only a game, and something certain so-called manly men do to squeeze precious nectar of testosterone out of their nutsacks like an orange on a juicer.
In other words, you have come to the right place for inciteful NFL postseason analysis.
It’s the playoffs.
Those of you who caught my microblog on Twitter of the San Diego Chargers vs. The Denver Broncos already know what to expect. I’m going to hit it and I’m going to hit it hard.
The San Diego Chargers could have beaten Peyton Manning and The Denver Broncos in Mile High Stadium if they had followed my carefully developed strategy. Since Peyton’s offense was too powerful, my advice was to not field a defense and allow the Broncos to score at will. (This is essentially what happened.) Then, when on offense, the Chargers could break out their secret weapon and run the fake punt on first down. Every first down of the game.
–Tom B. Taker
Alas, the Chargers failed to heed my advice, so I’m forced to offer my predictions for the rest of the playoffs.
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San Diego super-Chunkers
From now on the Abyss is going to be a sports blog, because, yeah, I love sports. A lot. At least I used to. Okay, never mind. I’ll talk about sports just this once…
These are the facts as I remember them. I’m doing this by memory so don’t bench me if I fumble a bit.
The San Diego Chargers made it to the Super Bowl once where they were promptly crushed by Steve Young and the San Francisco 49ers.
The San Diego Padres made it to the World Series. Twice. And in those two trips they won a grand total of one game. One. That’s a World Series win-loss record of 1 out of 8. The only win came in 1984 against the Detroit Tigers in Game Two, when Kurt Bevacqua got the go-ahead RBI with a 5th inning home run. This was enough to give pitcher Andy Hawkins the win.
These days, when I think about the San Diego Chargers, I mostly think about Drew Brees and how he was traded to the New Orleans Saints who now have a Super Bowl win under their belts. Unlike San Diego.
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You say you want a Revolution
Image from RevKites.com
I couldn’t agree more. I want a Revolution, too. A Revolution kite!
What were you expecting? Politics??? 🙂
A Revolution is a four-string “stunt kite” with unique properties and abilities that are not possible with traditional one and two-string kites. The Revolution has the ability to do maneuvers like hover, fly upside down, fly in reverse direction, perform propeller-like spins and even “fly” underwater. The kite can also be “stacked” to fly multiple kites on the same lines. There is a lot you can do with a Revolution kite.
Pictured here is the Rev EXP model which is the basic model, suitable for a wide range of wind conditions, and currently offered on the company’s web site for about $209 including the lines.
The kite was introduced in 1989 and the official web site offers a limited edition 20th Anniversary edition for $350. The also offer versions suited for low wind that can even be flown indoors.
Flying is controlled with two handles with two-lines each, a top line and a bottom line. When you pick up the handles for the first time it can be a little intimidating. It is something you either grok or you don’t. It didn’t take too long for it to click for me, just a few minutes. I’ve seen it take longer for other people, sometimes much longer. I knew one person that took quite a few times out before it grokked. Once it does, though, it is intuitive and a lot of fun.
A long time ago I owned one of these. I think there were only two versions back then. Now there are lots of designs and styles including the “Masterpiece” series featuring custom designs.
If we’re going to have a Revolution then I say it should be a kite. 🙂
Learn more at RevKites.com.
Shouts from the Abyss 
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