Oregonians know well the distinctive shape of their state. It’s found on key chains, souvenir shot glasses, business logos, decorative plates and innumerable wood-carved thingies. I feel bad for states like Colorado that have an outline about as exciting as a rectangle.
Colorado, Wyoming and Utah are the only states which have boundaries defined solely by lines of latitude and longitude. (Thanks for the arcane knowledge, Wikipedia!)
After hearing about all of the sunny and warmer days that have been happening on the Oregon coast, this weekend my wife and I decided to go see for ourselves. The plan was to leave cold and foggy Portland behind and go all the way around the NW corner of that unique Oregon shape.
Here are a few photographs from the trip. I’ve left them full-size to they can be clicked to enlarge.
Before we can play, we need to know a few things. Like, what is a game? My attempt at a definition would be something like this:
Game – A competitive activity with participants, rules and objectives, and outcomes which are determined by strength, skill, or luck. A game is an activity severely perverted by the presence of humans.
Certain outcomes are deemed to be of value, others are not. The outcomes we like are known as winning. The ones we don’t are losing.
Too much emphasis on winning and losing can make the game unpleasant or even harmful, usually to the detriment of the “loser” but also, in many cases, to both sides.
I postulate that a game without rules is meaningless. If we sit down to a nice game of chess and you declare your opening move, “My pawn jetpacks above the board, whips out dual blasters and lazer-beams all your bitches” before sweeping my pieces to the floor, you have not won the game. At least not in terms of the defined rules.
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Do not bring up politics. Do not bring up politics. Do not bring up politics.
Ah, shit. I just pooched it three times.
There’s no place like home.
Laying in bed this morning I was thinking about my next blog post. I decided whatever the cost, it must not be about politics. So I decided to burst into song:
Tax cuts on the rich and hikes for the poor (no polo)
And you don’t want to endure years more four (no polo)
Spend your days fighting the right to abort (no polo)
Traders taking loses because their positions are short (no polo)
Or, maybe not.
Without further ado, the topic for today’s post is: The Lotto. (We writers call this a “segue.”)
My hypothesis: Each of us is born with X amount of “lotto luck” which we can use up in various ways. When it’s all used up, it’s gone. And when it’s all gone you win no more lotto. Evar.
I’ll illustrate with a short story about how I used up all of my lotto luck and took a major karma hit all at the same time. (I was an early multitasker.)
The wonderful content awaits just a stone’s throw away for those willing to make the jump.
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Obviously this piece was intended and destined to be a hardrock/pop song. It would be recorded in the style of Disturbed or perhaps Dope. At least that’s how I always envisioned it.
Of course this piece has nothing to do with me. That’s my special gift as a songwriter. Somehow I have the ability to empathetically inhabit the characters and situations that I create.
I sincerely hope you will enjoy this lyrical diversion.
I’m sure it’ll be a big, big hit.
by Tom B. Taker
you made the money
i screwed around
you paid the bills
i slowed you down
you did the work
i wasted time
you bossed me
i lost my mind
i am what you made me
you were responsible
i was a flake
you made decisions
i made mistakes
you were right
i was wrong
you held the cards
i didn’t belong
look where you led me
[angry metal guitar bridge]
see ya around, “mom”