I’m all a quiver. I wasn’t going to post about Tiger again but the shit just reached critical mass. Again. Yes, it can happen just that fast. 🙂

Suspicions Regarding Performance Enhancing Drugs

Tiger apologized. Some think he might have to apologize again. No, not for women. This time there is speculation that Tiger may have used performance enhancing drugs.

Tiger Woods might have more to apologize for

The gist of this piece is that a doctor who helped Woods with his knee surgery in 2008 has come under suspicion of possession of performance enhancing drugs (PEDs).

The doctor, Anthony Galea, is based in Canada. His assistant, Mary Anne Catalone, was stopped at the U.S. – Canadian border with vials of human growth hormone in her car. Catalone told authorities she was transporting the vials per the directions of her boss. Catalone also told investigators that her boss has administered PEDs to professional athletes. Galea’s client list includes athletes like “Olympians Dara Torres and Donovan Bailey, football players Chris Simms and Jamal Lewis, New York Mets shortstop Jose Reyes — and Woods.”

Woods, of course, denies any wrongdoing, and said that Galea provided something called “platelet-rich plasma therapy.” I’m trying to remain open-minded and not call a premature BULLSHIAT based merely on the name of that treatment.

The treatment consists of the the process of taking a vial of approx. 30 milliliters of blood, spinning it in a centrifuge, which will “separate the platelet-rich plasma from the other components. Then they inject the concentrated platelets at the site of the patient’s injury. In theory, the growth factors that platelets secrete (not including human growth hormone) spur tissue recovery.”

I get the feeling that by including the words “platelets” and “centrifuge” and “secrete” they think we’ll fall for the explanation of this treatment. Sorry, I still suspect BULLSHIAT.

There’s A CrApp For That

In other news, my lovely wife found this story. Time Magazine reports about a new iPhone “app” that was released on Feb. 25th called TigerText. The app is designed to expire your content after it has been read after a certain period of time. This is useful in all sorts of situations, like preventing your wife from discovering residual texts leftover from sexting messages with your mistresses.

“It works like this: when, say, a prominent politician sends his mistress an iPhone message via TigerText, the mistress will be prompted to install the app. When she has done so, she can read the message, but she can’t keep it. In fact, the message is never actually sent to her phone; it’s stored on TigerText’s servers. After the politician’s specified time span has elapsed — anywhere from one minute to five days — the message ceases to exist. There’s even a “delete on read” setting, which counts down from 60 after a message is opened and erases its text at zero.”

I guess it pays to know the apps on your spouse’s iPhone. Personally I’d say the mere presence of TigerChat should be immediate grounds for divorce.

It's in the hole!

Potent Quotables

I would like to close this post with a Tiger quotation from the first story. Please enjoy.

I knew my actions were wrong, but I convinced myself the normal rules didn’t apply.
–Tiger Woods