Elvis lyrics translated into English
The lucky sperm about to penetrate the ovum.
I have decided, as a pubic service, to run some Elvis Presley lyrics through the universal translator. I hope you enjoy these as if hearing them for the first time.
Doubt my qualifications? Don’t. I was literally married under a velvet painting of Elvis in the Graceland Wedding Chapel, Las Vegas, Nevada. (But not to my wife, mind you.) I’m qualified enough.
Now bring on the big romantic ballads…
It’s Now Or Never
It’s now or never
(Daddy is in the mood)
Come hold me tight
(I will direct the action)
Kiss me my darling
(This had better be good)
Be mine tonight
(This will decidedly not be a long-term relationship)
Tomorrow will be too late
(Parts of me are feeling blue)
It’s now or never
(No promises after the booze wears off)
My love won’t wait
(There’s a BP situation in my pants)
Wasn’t that fun? Are you feeling all romantic? Make the jump and let’s do one more.
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Photography Nirvana: Finding Elvis
Have you ever found surprises while looking through your pictures? Maybe there was something in the background you didn’t notice while taking the shot. Then, when reviewing and processing the image, you’ll notice something for the first time ever. “What the heck is that?”
Of course, unlike me, you may possess actual “awareness” and it’s like I’m talking alien right now.
Sometimes I’ll be cropping and trying to invent something known as “composition.” The little blinking square of dashed lines (aka marching ants) that I’ve used to highlight some part of my image may be just about right except for that “thing” that’s included. What is that thing, anyway? Don’t ask me. I’m just the photographer. How the heck would I know?
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Shouts from the Abyss 
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