Travel Slog: Portland to Hood River
Last weekend my wife and I decided to go exploring from Portland to Hood River, Oregon. Our new hometown of Portland, of course, you probably know well from the documentary series Portlandia. We moved here to do our part to help keep Portland “weird.” I took that as a personal invitation.
The city of Hood River is located about 60 miles east of Portland, 30 miles north of Mount Hood, and up the mighty Columbia River, upriver of the Bonneville Dam. It’s well known for it’s apples and pears.
Most of the journey cuts through the geologic and massively impressive Columbia River Gorge. Multnomah Falls is a well known landmark visible from the highway along the way.
After visiting Hood River, we departed on a 35-mile scene drive north of town named the “Fruit Loop” that wound its way through “orchards, forests, farmlands, delicious fruits, wineries, fields of fragrant lavender, and adorable alpacas.”
Of course my travel slog photography includes practically none of that scenic stuff. Below please enjoy other things that happened to catch my eye instead.
Super Ikearrhea
The other night I went out to howl at a “super” moon. Unfortunately I couldn’t figure out how to unbuckle my belt. Opportunity missed!
Meanwhile, while flying high in my ballon chair, I spied the IKEA moon base where my wife and I had recently shopped. I decided to take a photograph and immortalize the moment for my friend Blogdramedy.
Curse my luck! Mount St. Helens photobombed the shot. What were the odds of that? Nothing ever goes right for me!
I Climbed Mount Everest
A lot of you have been exceedingly curious about my highly successful expedition to the summit of Mount Everest, the highest mount on Earth. Quit pestering me, dammit!
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single schlep.
–Me, paraphrasing Laozi
In the world of video games, there is a concept known as the voluntary challenge. It basically means, “I’m so bad ass I can win this thing while restricting myself in some way.” For example, you might try to win Mario Kart without using a vehicle. Or successfully ascend to the status of demigod in Nethack while adhering to a strictly vegan diet. Eating corpses left behind by mobs is a great way to pick up intrinsics that are vital to winning the game, so this is no small achievement.
This is my post about the time I climbed Mt. Everest. It is not a story I often share. And because I’m not that flamboyant, I decided there would be no recognition of voluntary challenges of any kind.
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