Baby, do I look nerdy in this?

Abyss Island: S1E7 – Set Phasers on Food / The Trouble With Kibbles

My wife named this challenge: “Star Trek or Star Wife”

I strolled into the challenge sportin’ my official tribe buff and hoisting the toilet plunger the proudly bears the ZeitGuru team flag. I was feeling cocky and confident. After all, I was batting .750. I had won three challenges in a row (after losing that initial house of cards travesty of justice). I’m on a win streak. What could possibly go wrong?

Rumor had it that this reward was going to be one “worth playing for” and I was more than ready. My tummy was in a twitter of anticipation. It growled ominously like a Rigellian ox as I stepped in and assumed my station on the pad.

“Energize.”

“Belay that order, mister! We’ve got a challenge to finish and Starfleet ain’t yella.”

As usual, the Priority One communiqué from the Federation only served to muddle my mind. I took it in my ready room on a secure channel:

To boldly go where no man has gone before
To know your wife and make the score.

James, Spock, Scotty and George Takei
If you’re not careful you’ll make your wife cry.

Outer space is where you’ll do well.
Upsetting your wife…
You’ll wish you lived in Hell.

Obviously I was going to be quizzed on my knowledge of my wife, like some variation of the Newlywed Game. But how in the hell would Star Trek fit into this? Dammit, man, I’m a negativist philosopher, not a doctor!

Leave it to my wife to up the stakes. I found myself in the Neutral Zone with a lot more than a meal to worry about. Failure in this challenge could mean the end of the Organian Marital Peace Treaty itself.

Fiendishly clever.
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