Snot
It’s been a long, long time since I generated a puzzle.
All you have to do is figure out what’s going on in this excerpted column of numbers. Any bean counters out there? This is a great way to spend your free time.
Don’t bother searching for help. Even the almighty Google is powerless to help you here.
Let’s roll!
293964673 843711893 934911548 657511668 675385661 629282665 428252383 827272787 137477727 111774723 111167338 111185574 111166766 111156824 111122114 111177114 111126116 111199116 625268916 628863136 634362136 832337832 433338138 533333933 433333633 433333133 433333833 611179566 211159619 911187516 111111316 111111114 111111117 111111115 111111113 111111111
Firewater Fireworks
In general, the lower the IQ the greater the thrill from fireworks and twinkly noisy thingies.
Word from the western front arrived early. It was going to be a “heat advisory” kind of a day. We hunkered in our bunkers and prepared for the worst. I put on a pair of clean tighty whities. Because:
To brine thine own self be true.
–Tom B. Taker
I was already looking forward to the salt water sores in my private areas. You know what they say. “Fight ’em over there or in your underwear.” Like always I choose the latter.
Day 1
Sunday night the neighbor set up a table saw in his front yard. He ran that sucker until 11:36 pm. On a work night. I kid you not. I believe this is the exact storyline of the movie Saw.
Day 2
Even more table saw. It was all squee … squee … squee … when the hours were wee.
What every happened to politeness? Basic manners? Please and thank you? All as dead as my peace of mind and peace and quiet.
Two nights of noise in a row. The urge to fling poo was becoming unbearable. Somehow, though, I was able to hold on.
But, little did I know it at the time, those two nights were merely flanking feints. The best was still yet to come.
Boom Shack-A-Lak!
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Big Shot
OK. Hey, I’m not trying to be a big shot or anything like that, but I get my drinks half price.
(audience laughter)
Mr. MARTIN: That’s right, for every one you buy, I get two. So I can just have about as much as I want, you know what I mean? And it doesn’t affect me.
(sound of someone falling)
–Steve Martin
“Studies.” Some people say that word with utter contempt. “What the hell can studies tell us about anything? Fuck studies.”
Let’s review a few of my favorites.
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Intelligence is a beach
Howdy lab rats.
Today we find that the universe has washed up two pieces of flotsam on my shore. Let’s take a look.
Flotsam #1
Is it dumb to start smoking? I happen to think so. But that’s just one pompous dork’s opinion, right? Maybe not. According to a story published by Reuters Health on Feb. 23, 2010, young men who smoked a pack of cigarettes a day (or more) had an average IQ that was 7.5 points lower than their non-smoking counterparts. The study was conducted on 20,111 young men, all 18-years old, who were recruited into the Israeli military.
Researchers have long known about correlations between smoking and other factors like age, education level, and economic status.
Age has a dramatic linear progression on smoking rate. By age group, the smoking rates reported by the CDC are:
18-24 = 28.5%
25-44 = 25.7%
45-64 = 22.7%
65 and older = 9.3%
According to the CDC, “Educational attainment has been associated consistently with adult smoking prevalence since 1983.” Persons with a GED had a reported smoking rate of 42.3 percent. For those with a high school diploma the rate dropped to 25.6% and the rate was only 7.2% for those with graduate degrees.
The poverty level also has a correlation on the smoking rate. For those above the poverty level the rate is 22.2% while for those under the rate jumps to 32.9%.
In addition to IQ scores, I think an argument can be make for “intelligence” in these other factors, too, like age, education level and economic status.
Flotsam #2
Just the other day, on Feb. 26, 2010, I saw a report on CNN that linked some other interesting factors to intelligence as well. They are: liberalism, atheism, and male sexual exclusivity. The non-smoking factor I can easily accept at face value, but this shit just got interesting!
According to the study these traits are not evolutionary in the sense that they would have “benefited” the survival of the species.
The reasoning is that sexual exclusivity in men, liberalism and atheism all go against what would be expected given humans’ evolutionary past. In other words, none of these traits would have benefited our early human ancestors, but higher intelligence may be associated with them.
“The adoption of some evolutionarily novel ideas makes some sense in terms of moving the species forward,” said George Washington University leadership professor James Bailey, who was not involved in the study. “It also makes perfect sense that more intelligent people — people with, sort of, more intellectual firepower — are likely to be the ones to do that.”
Flotsam #3
This one isn’t new, but I can’t help adding it to the mix. Vegetarianism also has a link to intelligence. A study found that children with a high IQ are more likely to become vegetarians later in life. You can read about it here on the BBC News web site as reported on Dec. 16, 2006.
Please pardon me while I pause to take a personal inventory.
- Non-smoker? Check!
- Liberal? Check!
- Atheist? Check!
- Sexual exclusivity? Check!
- Vegetarian? For about 3-1/2 months now. Check!
Damn. I am one smart hombre. 🙂
Shouts from the Abyss 
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