Tag Archives: follow
Embedded: Twitter puts outage
Earlier this week, Twitter went down. It went down hard. It was scary. I know because I was there. I now officially have the PTSD. At last, I’m finally somebody.
The duration of the outage was about 45 minutes. That’s approximately twice the amount of time Apollo 13 spent out of radio contact when it was behind the moon. I just got a double dose of what it must have felt like to be in Mission Control. And I’m a non-smoker!
It was the longest outage since Twitter’s IPO and the second crash in the last nine days.
The outage was described in the strongest possible terms as the “longest outage since the IPO.” What those two things have to do with each other I have absolutely no idea.
Some in the media took the opportunity to write quippish jokes about the mayhem. (Hint: It was too soon.) Jokes, I must say, that practically wrote themselves.
- “Twitter Suffers Outage During Biz Stone’s Panel at SXSW” – I don’t know what a “Biz Stone” is but I bet it was pissed. Source: WSJ.
- “Twitter Outage Takes Site Down for 45 Minutes, Users Stranded” – I bet a lot of them were forced to hitchhike. Source: Newsmax.com.
- “Twitter goes down, chaos and productivity ensue” – What the fuck are you implying? Source: Washington Post.
- “‘We Experienced Unexpected Complications’: The Language Of Twitter Outages” – Hey, that’s the hip new lingo. Source: Lifehacker Australia.
- “Twitter Goes Down: Something is Technically Wrong” – You have a firm grasp of the obvious. Souce: The Next Web.
- “Twitter Briefly Goes Down, Silencing Millions Of Horrible, Unnecessary Twitter Jokes” – That hurts, that really hurts. Source: Huffington Post.
Again, as your intrepid embedded reporter, I was there on the front lines. What follows are my eyewitness firsthand accounts of the action as it unfolded.
Continue reading →
Sneaky Snarky Tweet
Boys and girls take warning, if you go near the tweet
Don’t follow too many, your timeline will overheat
Now maybe they won’t see you, maybe they won’t hark
When you sneak up behind them, while laughing at your snark
Today I give out my patented top secret technique for managing your Twitter account. Just the other day I gave away my patented Tort Reform Quiz for Dummies absolutely free. Now here I go again, giving away the store. For free!
My patents are flying out the door. I think I must be patently insane. It’s all part of my gift to you, the loyal reader.
Have you ever followed anyone on Twitter only to be irritated by how they keep on tweeting additional shit? So annoying! Like they actually believe someone gives a shit? I know!
Sure, you could unfollow them but that’s the coward’s way out. If only there was some other way?
Now there is! Read on to learn my secret technique. Shhhhhh! This is only between you and me. Don’t tell anyone.
Continue reading →
Let’s Give Them Something To Tweet About
Note: Internet search tells me I’m only the 42 millionth person to think up the title used for this post. Maybe those 42 million other bozos can tweet about how unoriginal I am.
Ah, Twitter. Cruel mistress of pain and delight. An effective combination to be sure. Today I’m going to go random on the topic of Twitter. To honor the spirit of the subject matter, I’m going to try to limit my piths to 140 characters or less. (That’s a big plus for most of you right there!)
Twitter on the creep
Let's go bodysurfing now, everybody's learning how, come on and safari with me
— Tom B. Taker (@shoutabyss) February 12, 2010
With this tweet, I boldly forayed into the world of Twitter. Since then, I’ve done the 140 thing 3,836 times. I did the math and that works out to an average of 7.24 tweets per day. Yeah, that sounds about right.
In my travels I’ve learned one thing and I’ve learned it well. If a thought pops into my head I’d better record it fast, or it will die a quick death and never see the light of day ever again. That’s where Twitter comes in. At home, work, or with my little handheld device, if I have a thought that I like, I jam it into the Twitter. Now it’s safe!
It has been one year, five months and 15 days since I started my “timeline.” (Wow. That almost makes it sound like I wasn’t living before Twitter.) During that time I have followed 145 people. Twitter tells me that 112 people are currently following me, and I estimate less than half the number are real people. The rest are some kind of bot and/or people who just follow lots in the hopes of gaining reciprocal follows. To them, Twitter is a numbers game and the one with the most followers wins. Just an FYI: You can’t take your followers with you when you die.
Me? I’m a bit more choosey. On average I’d followed someone only once every 4.9 days. I don’t like my timeline going all apeshit and overloading me with incoming tweets so I really have to find someone interesting before I’ll make that level of commitment. Twitter tells me that the first person I ever followed was Catherine Sherman (@cathsherman) who was one of my very first friends on WordPress and still a good friend today!
I have never followed anyone in the hopes that they’ll return the favor. Nor have I ever unfollowed anyone because they won’t follow me. The law of mandatory reciprocity does not apply. It’s nice when the level of interest is two way, but I’m not going to unfollow someone just because they have good taste! (Heh.)
I have unfollowed people before, but it is rare. Usually it is because I feel overwhelmed by the volume of their tweets. Some people tweet 100 times a day or more! Even I don’t have that many thoughts in a single day, a much fewer that are of any interest. (Even then there may be debate about the ones I let through!)
What sparked all of the Twitter contemplation was someone I interacted with recently. He has only been on Twitter for three days. He has tweeted 18 times. (That’s very close to my average.) And he follows a whopping 775 people! That’s over 250 follows per day.
Meanwhile, he has 207 followers (which blows me out of the water) and has already been “listed” four times. Apparently those lists are automated because they say, “A self-updating list showing who recently followed me (made using @formulists).”
The success of someone on Twitter only three days who doubles me in followers can be discouraging. However, I am resisting the urge to do anything differently. I prefer sending and receiving quality, and that’s how I’m going to continue. I can’t imagine much worse than reading a bunch of crap from people where I have absolutely no interest.
If I follow you, that’s generally a good sign. You can take it as a compliment!
A Twitter Tip
Lastly, I’d like to close with a tip. What to do about people I want to follow even when they overly tweet their asses off?
I think there are two kinds of people I follow. Those that I’m very interested in and those I’m sort of interested in. The former group I try to read everything they say. With the later group, though, I don’t care if I miss a few every now and again.
How do I handle this?
I installed TweetDeck and use the Twitter feature of “lists” to separate those groups. For the A-Listers, I created a group called “Inner Circle.” Everyone else gets placed in a group called, strangely enough, “Everyone else.”
Both groups are private since they are for my own internal use only.
I’ll admit it is a bit of a hassle sorting people into these groups, but it is a one-time only activity.
Once that is done, create a “column” in Tweet Deck for each group. My first column is dedicated to the “Inner Circle” and the next column is for “Everyone Else.” I try to keep up on the first column. The other columns in Tweet Deck I read as time permits.
I hope you’ll find this tip useful.
Twitter 101: Reply vs Mention
I really enjoy the Twitter. It’s the special place reserved for most of my … ahem … wit. (If I do say so myself.) If you don’t follow me on Twitter I dare say you are missing a lot of what I have to offer.
I think it’s an art form. The 140-character limit is perfect for bite-sized chunks of humor that wouldn’t justify a full blog post. I think the micro-blogging idea was rather brilliant.
True, there is a lot of bullshit on Twitter. Like location tweets. “I’m at Starbucks.” Well now, goodie for you. I guess we know you are a venti-sized ass. “I’m at the stadium watching XYZ sporting event.” And you’re tweeting about it while you’re still there? I call that a lose-lose. “I’m at Ye Olde Fancy Restaurant.” What? You didn’t include what you’re eating? Loser. “I’m at Walgreens.” Holy shit! Must be time for suppositories?
Twitter. The new way for those who think they are the super-trendy to be seen. At least virtually. Continue reading →
Feeling blogged down
If I'm involved then that is an extreme overvaluation.
I love you bloggers, yo! ❤
In fact, a little too much. When I see a blog I like, I do not hesitate to pound the “Subscribe” function. I make absolutely no effort to restrain myself in any way. Me likey, me clicky.
And therein lies the problem.
I’m on blogger overload!
Call me obsessed. Say I have the blogger version of OCD. I don’t know what to do!
First, I don’t have a lot of free time in my average day. Second, I am attempting to keep up with more blogs than I can even read. How in the name of Zeus’ butthole am I going to comment on them, too?
One thing I really love doing is commenting on blogs other than my own. Seriously, I get a lot of enjoyment from that. And because I’m all blogged down, that has suffered. A lot.
I sincerely apologize. Lately I’ve been a very bad bloggy friend.
Curious about the numbers, I went and took a look. According to WordPress I currently subscribe to 52 blogs. (That wasn’t easy to figure out, either, since the Manage my Subscriptions function doesn’t count them for me.) Wow!
The goal I set for myself was to comment on most of your posts, especially the ones I found most interesting. I also review Freshly Pressed daily. And, somehow, I have impulsively made a commitment to post on my own blog … every … single … day.
I’m doomed!
So now I’m realizing that I can’t follow every WordPress blog.
Please know that if I haven’t commented on your blog for a little while it is nothing personal. I still love you. I just gotta figure out a way to get a handle on things before I blog myself up. Is there a self-help group for this sort of thing? 🙂