As I walk through this world
Nothing can stop the Puke of Hurl
And you, the trap you unfurled
And you can so hurt me, oh yes
TWO DAYS EARLIER
I love leftovers. There I was at the fast food restaurant picking up dinner when I had my aha moment. I’ll get extra deep fried things on purpose so I’ll have enough for leftovers in the future.
It would be something, a small thing, that I was actually looking forward to.
Meanwhile, deep in the Pacific Ocean, somewhere over the Great Pacific garbage patch, ominous dark swirling clouds began to form.
It was almost lunch time. I didn’t realize it at the time, but I was in a good mood. I was on the way to the kitchen to prep my lunch. The lunch I had been looking forward to for two whole days. There was a bounce in my step as I walked down the hall. I hummed a little song to myself. I paused in the living room and played a game of peek-a-boo with the cat.
In less than five minutes I would be dead.
Continue reading →
Last Saturday, to celebrate my aunt’s birthday, my wife and I loaded up the car and took her into the hills for a little photography trip. Thanks to my aunt’s GPS we know that the trip involved a couple of hours and a climb of 4,000 feet in elevation from home base to advanced base camp. We were a mile high.
The goal of the day was “fall colors” and they were out in full display. Unfortunately all of the best shots were only visible from the highway. If you found someplace to pull over suddenly the world got boring. The colors would apparently run and hide. Nice one, nature.
We had a very loose plan. After we arrived we were going to play it by ear. And we were also trying to stay ahead of the weather. After months of no rain, it was very stormy, but when we came out the other side it was actually a pretty nice day.
One of the gals spotted a sign that hinted about eagles and a park. We took off down the road which seemed extremely private and extremely unpaved. A few miles in we finally gave up and turned around. Later, once we were back home, a check of the internet revealed that if we had keep going a little farther it would have been a nice spot to see bald eagles. Oh darn.
Continue reading →
When we last left our intrepid explorer, he was lugging an amazing distance all of the potable water to camp for four days and three nights. (See post Let’s Go Camping.) We now resume with events leading up to The Incident.
True, on that first night, I was extremely careful about where I went pee. I scouted out secluded locations and carefully checked for anyone who might be in the vicinity. (We were camped right by the trail that runs along the creek.) By the next day, however, the animal had kicked in and I went whenever and wherever the urge hit. I’d wave at people as they walked by. Continue reading →