Selected pairing for this post: Enjoy!
http://explosm.net/comics/3355/

Hey, thanks for having me over. I hope you don’t mind, but you did say, “Make yourself at home.”

So I:

• Performed maximum quaffage on every partial bottle of whiskey.
• Deleted all West Wing from your DVR and recorded a full season of Honey Boo Boo.
• Adjusted the hot water heater to maximum.
• Rubbed every towel on my butt rather than use toilet paper.
• Let your cat outside.
• Used your wi-fi to download the entire Metallica library with BitTorrents.
• Dug your coffee can of cash out of the backyard.
• Unlocked the windows and the side door on the garage.
• Licked your ketchup bottle clean.
• Went “two turntables and a microphone” on your collection of LPs.
• Pushed over your hoarding piles in the garage and took a nap.
• Spent your remaining iTunes balance on Demi Lovato.
• Cleaned my genitals with your toothbrush.
• Used your mom’s ashes to refill the litter box.

Don’t be angry. All of these are considered normal back home.