The 10 Tweets You Should Never Read Before You Die

A recent smattering of my with and pit…

Short and sweet.

You deplete me.

— Tom B. Taker (@shoutabyss) March 11, 2016

Officially it was “cordrazine” but tri-ox compound sounds much cooler.

I'm like Doctor McCoy after he got pumped full of tri-ox compound. "Assassins! Murderers! Murderers! Assassins! You! What planet is this?!"

— Tom B. Taker (@shoutabyss) February 23, 2016

A little something for Netflix music buffs.

Steve Avery ran a criminal salvage yard. He's Felonious Junk.

— Tom B. Taker (@shoutabyss) March 10, 2016

Suckin’ on the corporate teat is blowin’ in the wind.

"We're stickin' it to the man," said the protester holding a Starbucks grande Pike Place roast.

— Tom B. Taker (@shoutabyss) March 10, 2016

It’s the only way I’ll sit still that long.

I told the artist I wanted to be drawn and quartered.

— Tom B. Taker (@shoutabyss) March 10, 2016

A brilliant strategy, really. We just got done not giving a fuck. What better time to ask for more money?

Law enforcement said, "Sorry but we don't enforce the crime that happened to you, but be sure to increase our funding."

— Tom B. Taker (@shoutabyss) March 10, 2016

This is not an exaggeration. He’s exactly like that kid. Exactly.

The #boss is that kid in Game of Thrones that says, "I want to see the Bad Man fly." The Bad Man is our project and he never read the spec.

— Tom B. Taker (@shoutabyss) March 10, 2016

Because you don’t know anything about “survival” until you’ve worked on a puzzle.

Is there anything more exciting than Jeff Probst saying, "puzzle pieces?" #Survivor

— Tom B. Taker (@shoutabyss) March 10, 2016

Some day I’ll finish these lyrics, hire a band, and be a famous folk singer. (Sung to the tune of The Cat Carol.) https://youtu.be/yZ2sa3tyvkI

There was a beach in a sunny land / Where people went to swim and tan / A mother #dolphin and her little pup / Swam too close to the sand

— Tom B. Taker (@shoutabyss) March 10, 2016

“I will not be upstaged by George Lucas,” shouted Abrams. “I get my special editions, too.”

J.J. Abrams On The "Mistake" In Star Wars: The Force Awakens: "I accidentally left in one scene where Han shoots first. It'll be fixed."

— Tom B. Taker (@shoutabyss) March 9, 2016