Monthly Archives: May, 2015

Blip Service

How I plan to die.

This is how I plan to die.

This is part 42 in our never-ending coverage of the techpocalypse. Note to self: Kill everyone on staff for overusing the apocalypse thing. -Ed

Once upon I time I said, “Golly gee whiz wilikers, I wish I could see anything I wanted at the time of my choosing. You know, that on demand shit.”

That’s when Lt. Uhura showed up, called me “Captain Adventure,” stunned me with her phaser and uproariously laughed, “Be careful what you wish for.”

One thing they never told you. After one is stunned by a phaser blast one will tend to void their bowels. Finally something worthy of pay-per-view.

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There Are Stupid Questions

stupid-questionsSomeone the other day said to me, “You should write another blog post.” Technically that’s not a question. Technically.

They say you should be careful what you wish for. At least that’s what my parents told me.

Hang on. Please. We’re not accepting questions till the end. Please let me finish. You see, I know a thing or two about stupid questions. I used to ask them. A lot.

I did it on purpose. Ain’t I a stinker?

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Hyppo and Critter: Follower

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I’m the Bad Guy?

doghouseLast night my wife and I had a conversation.

“What’s for dinner?”

“I don’t know. What do you want?”

“Dunno. What do you want?”

“Dunno, either.”

“Looks like we’re going out.”

“Yup.”

“Yup.”

Seriously. Why I’m not picking up an Oscar for best original screenplay beats the hell out of me.

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Hyppo and Critter: Selfie Time

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