Hello #Sodomy My Old Friend

Hello sodomy my old friend
I’ve come to stalk with you again
Immoral neighbors who were not sleeping
Wasting seeds! What I learned by peeping
And my vision of their vile recreation
Twas not for procreation
They were not making babies

I often sit home alone and ponder sodomy. Yes, it’s true. What the hell? You have to admit, although weird, it’s still better than masturbation, right? Besides, if my palms got too hairy I might lose my ability to write this blog. If that happened I think we’d all agree: Win, win!

So we humans spend all of our time making laws to control each other based on our own beliefs. Amazingly, sodomy laws are still in the news. So I naturally wondered: How far can this go? What if certain people get everything they want?

Let’s see if we can calculate a possible progression (you can insert sodomy on this trajectory anywhere you wish):

• Late term abortions (obvious)
• Earlier abortions
• The morning after pill
• Contraception
• The rhythm method
• Masturbation
• Non-missionary positions
• Missionary position for any purpose other than getting pregnant
• Adultery
• Divorce
• Not attending church
• Not rodding your children enough

Where does it end? What have I forgotten? Elaborate!

Update: I forgot the audio track for this post.