We live in a society

I am here to restore your faith in humanity. If you believe that humans are a slug upon the universe and that Earth is the slime trail it has left behind.

Now all we need is a dash of salt and a pint of beer. (To be dumped on the slug.)

society: the aggregate of people living together in a more or less ordered community. “More or less!” Ha ha ha! At least they got that part right.

I read today from the Book of News, Human Behavior, Stockholm Syndrome, Chapter 6:

A “middle-aged” drunk man on his way home from a party fell off a subway platform in Stockholm, Sweden, hit his head on the tracks, and knocked himself unconscious. And, as luck would have it, a train was right on the way! You might think that’s the whole story, but wait! There’s more.

A security camera caught a passerby leaping down to the where the man was lying. No word yet if it was in his own vomit and/or if he had peed himself.

Was a good dead about to unfold? Would the man be pulled to safety just in the nick of time?

Decidedly, no.

The Spider Man witness relieved the man of his valuables, climbed back up on the platform leaving his “mark” behind. He calmly walked out of the station and even reportedly waved to the ticket vender. Moments after the robbery the victim’s head was struck by said train. The man was seriously injured and doctors were forced to amputate half of his left foot.

Is there anything humanity can’t do?

Score:
Humanity 0. Survival of the Shittest: 1.

Source:
Morning Sentinel

6 responses

  1. See? That’s what Euro-socialism gets you. If that’d been in America, the guy’d have been stripped clean before he hit the ground.

    Like

    1. This criminal mastermind is stone cold. And a fast thinker and an opportunist. I’d like to glue his face to the third rail.

      Like

  2. Deborah the Closet Monster | Reply

    Gah. I know that’s not much to say, but I can’t quite bring myself to “Like” this. So . . . gah.

    Like

    1. Part two was going to be about a porn star who got out of a ticket. I left it off because the source story was a few years old.

      Like

  3. Dude… you’d waste a pint of beer on a slug?

    Like

    1. Working in the garden is fun. Find a slug. Pour out a little bit on the slug then drink the same amount. Repeat until there are no more slugs or double slugs.

      Like

Bringeth forth thy pith and vinegar

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