Civility and tolerance on holiday

Sometimes there are moments in life that are more memorable than others. Some moments stand out.

On the other hand, there are also moments you can’t remember no matter what, like where you put your car keys last night. I guess I’m going to be late to work.

I remember a moment at my latest job when the conversation turned to religion and I decided enough time had passed and I was secure enough in my position that I could out myself. I revealed my atheism.

The response was not easy to forget. My boss turned to me and said, “Can I ask you a question? Why don’t you kill people?” This from a religious person who I have come to regard as being much less ethical and moral as I am.

It’s a weird world we live in.

At work I’m a minority. There are a total of four people working in the office. 25 percent of them are atheist. 50 percent are Mormons. And another 25 percent are garden variety “Christians” of unknown specific beliefs.

How did all of this come to be public information? Thinking back on it, I realized that the atheist in the midst was the only one who didn’t frequently broadcast his beliefs to everyone around him. Everyone else seemingly went way out of their way to project their beliefs into the workplace. Again, I find that weird.

Personally I found it quite enough motivation to keep my atheist views to myself. I wasn’t about to leap into the middle of the fray and shout, “Look at me! I’m different than the rest of you.”

So it came to be that it took quite some time before I finally outed myself. It wasn’t that I was actively hiding anything, but I wasn’t in any great hurry to reveal it, either. Back when I was still a probationary employee I had to consider the very real possibility that such a revelation would get my ass promptly shown the door. I didn’t really know these people yet, so caution was advised.

After a while came the time of the revealing. Back then there were only three of us in the office. The 66.6 percent (coincidence, I’m sure) hinted, probed and outright questioned me about my beliefs on a near constant basis. I found such behavior inappropriate but not overly offensive. After all, I actually take a bit of pride in my beliefs. I arrived at my beliefs applying my own thoughts and reasoning. For example, the decision to become atheist wasn’t something I simply adopted for the comfort of being similar to my parents. It was something I decided on my own and for myself.

My status, as expected, didn’t generate much hubbub and appeared to be readily accepted. There was a brief period where it prompted several predictable philosophical discussions, like how I viewed “right” and “wrong” and stuff like that. But that sort of stuff eventually died down.

But it did very subtly set me apart. And it has been that way ever since.

Last week there was much chit chat about the impending Easter weekend. The 75 percent were discussing big plans since, for them, Easter is a big day. Then my boss turned to me and said, “Do you have any plans for Easter? Oh, you probably don’t celebrate that day, right?”

Upon reflection, I realize I must have been irked by the way he asked. Without thinking, I replied, “Of course I do. It’s Zombie Jesus Day.”

I immediately regretted my flippant response. But there was no way in hell I was about to apologize, either. So there it floated with no take-backs.

I’m not generally out to tear down the beliefs of others. I do very much enjoy, however, pointing out a good hypocrisy, and that’s a sport I engage in often. I generally respect those with religious beliefs, because in my experience they are sincere. I can even be happy for them. I’ve had some religious people in my life I’ve really admired. Where I run into trouble, though, is when I don’t get that same sort of respect in return. Then there is trouble. (Like my recent Divide and Canker t-shirt in response to a preacher saying who should leave this country of freedom.)

What gets me is when someone says, “You are an atheist. You are not saved. You are going to Hell.” And then, if I say anything contrary to that, even just merely sharing my belief (which I’m entitled to) I get the response, “Why are you being disrespectful?” Excuse me? Project much?

To be continued…