A couple of weeks ago Yahoo! got a new CEO. He can earn up to $26 million in 2012 in cash, stock and bonuses.

This is an FYI: I’m available to do the job for less. Ah, shit. I can probably take as little at $500k and fuck the stock options and bonuses. I bring a wide array of skills to the table and I work lean and mean.

And I can use words like: synergy, win-win, “I got this,” blazin’, meggy, modernization, crowdsourcing, “low-hanging fruit” and social media. Oh, also: array and “lean and mean.”

I also have lots of ideas. Here’s a freebie to give you a wee taste: Don’t spend $26 million a year on a new hire.

Yahoo!, I await. Have your people call my people and we’ll do lunch.