Mr. Spock, where are you?

Scanning, Captain.

Tonight the Google Let Me Down
Sung to the tune of “Tonight the Bottle Let Me Down”

Tonight the Google let me down
Displayed results without my search term not around
An image search for “Spock” with nothing found
Tonight the Google let me down

So yeah, there I was on the Google. I wanted a new wallpaper, so I did what I usually do: Google Image Search (GIS) with the exact dimensions of 1920 x 1200 (which just happens to be my display resolution).

I have found that I can get interesting wallpaper results by omitting “wallpaper” as a term and searching images that just so happen to match the dimensions of my desktop. I like to be different I guess. (For my personal safety I keep “safe search” at moderate. If I set it to “anything goes” I’d likely be buried in porn, and that’s no good. Google is, after all, one of the largest purveyors of porn in the Universe. Or so I’ve heard.)

Being in a logical mood, I decided to use “Spock” as a search term. I was hoping to find results of a type never before encountered.

As usual, some of the results were representative of the search term and some were not. Also, as not, there was a surprising number of frisky images of women in bikinis. Now what do they have to do with Spock? Highly illogical.

Want to try the exact search for yourself? Click here.

I kept scrolling down the image results looking for a suitable wallpaper that I could meld with, but none really moved me. Gradually, however, I began to become aware of something. Spock wasn’t in very many of the results.

I took a screenshot of the results. By only page 5 Spock was strangely no where in sight. Four of the results in this shot actually pertain to Star Trek but no Mr. Spock. There’s a couple video game shots, a Robert Downey Jr., a sexy girl in a hammock, a jumbo jet, and a refreshing glass of Coke. I guess I have to ask, “Hey, Google! Where is the Mr. Spock in this equation?”

One thing is certain. I won’t be trusting my past or future to Google computations for time warp (beta).

Google is imperfect. Abyss will sterilize. Along with all the carbon-based life forms infesting the third planet of this solar system.

This is fruitless. Release the Corbomite!

10 responses

  1. tried yr search and was hoping that maybe they would have combined spock in a bikini, but no such luck either 🙂


    1. If that ever happened, it would have been while he was under the influence of the spores. Go Spock, go!


  2. I like the pop-art version of Mr. S.


    1. Oh yeah. That was a good find. The image is clickable and leads to other pop-art pics, too.


  3. The frisky images? Spock’s live body host is into painting nudes. I’m surprised that little factoid didn’t pop up in Google. I guess when it comes to Leonard, Googles a bit of a nimrod. 😉


    1. Actually, I already knew that. And, if memory serves, Captain, he doesn’t paint just any old nudes. I seem to recall them being … how shall we say … “rubenesque.”


      1. I prefer the word fulsome. Some of those women can make a guy some ful. 😉


  4. Well, yet something else, eh? We both knew about his photography work. Personally I really like it. I see what he sees. I feel what he feels.

    That was a little Spock stuff stuck in at the end there. See? 🙂


  5. Google image results are funny. Too easy to manipulate IMHO and you are much more likely to get hit with unsafe pages containing virus’s and the likes but the image search has improved a bit recently (recently being end 2011 to 2012).

    Google image search IMHO has great potential but people seem to neglect image files and regarding it as a part of the SEO and SEO in general so it is easier to find things which is where the main problems lays it is then left wide open for all the black hatters to rule the roost – which is not a good thing IMHO.

    People should try and put the effort to name their files better to get keywords in that match the pics and also use descriptive alt tags and then out lives would be easier when it comes to finding images to match out image searches.


    1. Good comment. Thanks for your insights!

      Some time has passed. I just tried the search again. Pages 1, 2 and 3 were pretty good, but on page 4 of the results I couldn’t see Spock at all.

      It certainly is an interesting phenomenon. Even the great Google struggles.


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