Daily Archives: April 21st, 2011

La famiglia luogo di lavoro – Mambo Italiano

office dogs

It's a dog-eat-dog office and I'm wearing Milk Bone underwear.

OK, it’s like, here’s the situation.

My work life consists of a room where it all happens. Office work, shipping, receiving, phones, etc. All within this space that is about the size of the living room at my house.

Three of us share this space. The boss, the co-worker, and myself. Our desks are laid out in such a way that they basically form a triangle, with about six feet between each of us. I call it the Bermuda Office Triangle of Death.

Isn’t it nice to love your job? I wouldn’t know.

So, as if that isn’t enough, la famiglia is added to the mix like little sprinkles on top. (Sorry, I’m feeling a little Italiano right now for some strange reason.)

The boss’ wife is a stay at home mom. She calls our office like 10 to 20 times a day.  Apparently her life consists of buying consumer goods on the internet (they get shipped to the office), dealing with their four kids who still live at home, working on her blog, and being helpless.

For example, if her cat needs to go to the vet, she can’t (or won’t) handle it. The boss has to leave the office during the work day to take care of it himself. If there is a household emergency of some sort, like a leaky container in the cupboard, he has to run home to take care of it.

Meanwhile, three of their four children come directly to the office right after school. This is their hangout until it’s time for dinner. Their first order of business is always consuming food. They must get starved at school! After that, they fight, play with the omnipresent dog (yes, the co-worker brings her dog to work every day – six weeks and counting), make phone calls, receive phone calls, yap, and generally cause a ruckus. They even spilled juice on one of the computer monitors the other day. (Naturally, they didn’t clean it up.) They leave behind food on the floor, dishes on the table and in the bathroom sink, and other sorts of mayhem.

As you can imagine it’s a wonderful work environment.

No, it’s not enough to have your boss be like fingernails on a blackboard, hate the physical environment, the lack of privacy, and the actual job duties. Oh no. The whole damn family has to land on your work existence like Normandy Beach.

That’s it. No conclusion to this post. Just venting. I hereby officially wish to predict how I will die. I will be found dead with my head on my desk from embolism. On the plus side, thanks to the tightly knit Bermuda Office Triangle of Death, it will most likely get noticed right away, probably by one of the kids. Or maybe the dog.


A cry for help

Did you hear the one ... ?

When it comes to social media I guess you could say I act just like my real life self: Socially awkward.

I don’t have that many followers on my Twitter. Currently I’m at an all-time high with 68. And a lot of those are people who describe themselves as “founders” of consulting companies, entrepreneurs, and social media experts. In other words, people who will follow practically anyone (self-evident, I know!) and don’t actually know a damn thing about me.

Thankfully most of the people are real and wonderful and considered valued friends that I’ve made exclusively through my blogging.

Credit: Wikipedia

Verily, when it comes to Twitter I value quality over quantity.

And I’m not normally one to come right out and ask for the social connections. Self-promotion is not my strong suit. My strategy so far has been, “just be yourself.” Hmm, on second thought, maybe my social situation isn’t so mysterious after all! 🙂

This time, though, I’m doing a science experiment and I need your help. (Yeah, we’ll call it that.) Last night in front of the telly I wrote a tweet that I instantly fell in love with. I bolted from my chair, but by the time I reached the computer I had already forgotten it. Damn. Then, this morning, a cat rubbed up against my leg and it all came back to me.

Tom B. Taker

Samuel L. Jackson narrates a new Disney movie: Enough is enough! I have had it with these motherfucking cats on these motherfucking plains!

April 21, 2011

That’s the tweet. LOL! Sometimes I crack myself up. Too bad most of the world it still missing out on my unique humor stylings and wit. Yeah, it sucks to be them.

So, just this once (yeah right) I’m asking my Twitter and blogging pals: If you like the tweet, please retweet it. Let’s see if we can make it all trendy and shit.

Shameless self-promotion and self-flagellation. That’s the new me.

If you like the tweet, “retweet” it, if you dare.

Hyppo and Critter: You say you want a Revolution

This is my “R” post for the April 2011 “A to Z Blogging Challenge.”