It’s time to hammer Somali pirates
If, and that’s a big if, I wanted to sail around the world, you can bet your ass I would steer clear of the waters off the coast of Somalia. You don’t have to be Einstein to make that sort of travel plan adjustment.
Besides, if I was kidnapped by Somali pirates, they’d be screwed. (And by logical extension, I’d be somewhat screwed as well.) I don’t think there is anyone on the planet who would be willing to pay more than $50 US to save my bacon. Sorry pirates, bad move kidnapping this guy.
Last minute Halloween costume ideas
I was going to do so much more with this post, but time runs short, so here it is, like it or not. This post may have been rushed to market but at least it was handcrafted in the USA!
Birther. Costume: Flag lapel pin. Accessories: Kenyan passport, seal embosser, AK-47, and a copy of Glenn Beck’s book “Arguing With Idiots.”
Prepper. Costume: Radioactive protection suit. Accessories: AK-47, canned foods, portable radio.
Truther. Costume: Flap lapel pin. Accessories: Tin foil hat, AK-47.
Swine Flu Virus. A costume based on a disease can be tricky to pull off. Creativity is a must. If you figure it out, let me know. Perhaps it looks a lot like the Mucinex cartoons on TV?
Energy Industry Lobbyist. (Heidi DeJong Barsuglia pictured.) You have to admit that the traditional costume for whore or prostitute is old and busted. But a costume based on someone who looks like this and who is employed as a lobbyist by the energy industry to sleep with politicians, well, that brings renewed hotness to the genre and makes this a trend-setting costume for young girls everywhere to crave. Barsuglia is one of the two lobbyists that California Assemblyman Mike Duvall claimed to be porking, his bragging about which was caught on tape.)
Katherine Harris. Accessories: Make up is a must. Lots of it. And hairspray. For bonus points: Knee pads and a hammer and chisel. Warning: This costume is intended for advanced users only due to the extreme fright factor. You have been warned. Mwuhahaha!
Hey Kiddies! Here are some extra last minute quickies. Remember, have fun and be creative!
Terrorist : Somali Pirate : Teabagger : MLB Player on Steroids : Political Talk Show Host : Rapper : Balloon Boy : Jon Gosslin : Zombie Michael Jackson : Jon Gosselin: Flava Flav
Survivors win wrongful death suit of “Wee for a Wii” contestant
It was reported yesterday that the survivors of a woman who died while participating in a radio station contest won a wrongful death lawsuit and were awarded $16.57 million in damages. The decision in this case was rendered by a 12-person jury.
The 28-year-old married woman and mother of two died of acute water intoxication after participating in a “Wee for a Wii” contest. The objective of the contest was a Nintendo Wii video game system. The prize was to be awarded to the contestant who consumed the most water without vomiting or urinating.
You can read the linked story for more information.
My question: Is the judgement against the radio station the proper outcome to a case like this? Where does the personal responsibility of choosing to participate end and the negligence of the contest organizers begin? I’m torn on this one and I think the answer is probably a little bit of both.
In a bit of a surprising news, it appears there may not be an appeal on the part of the defendants in this case:
Charles Sipkins, a spokesman for Entercom, said in a statement: “Jennifer Strange’s death was a tragedy. Our hearts go out to all of her loved ones, including, in particular, her husband and children. While legal restrictions preclude us from commenting further on the verdict, we respect the jury’s decision and hope that it will assist the Strange family in coping with its loss.”
Certainly not an ironclad statement by any stretch of the imagination, but it has an odd tone of concession to it in a case like this.
More Beatles songs to be used in marketing
Now that the Beatles library has been whored out to the highest bidder, I thought we could brainstorm more uses for the library. Here are some ideas:
You say you want a revolution
Well, you know
We all want to change the world
Americans For Prosperity
Bang! Bang! Maxwell’s silver hammer
Came down on her head.
Bang! Bang! Maxwell’s silver hammer
Made sure she was dead.
Sears Craftsman Tools
She’s so heavy…
Jenny Craig Weight Loss Centers
Why don’t we do it in the road?
No one will be watching us.
Why don’t we do it in the road?
Goodyear Tires and/or Mr. Goodwrench
Sitting a corn flake, waiting for the van to come
Kellogg’s Frosted Flakes
Well, she was just 17,
You know what I mean,
And the way she looked was way beyond compare.
So how could I dance with another (ooh)
When I saw her standin’ there.
Roman Polanski legal defense team
I’m trying to think of more, but I’m stumped. What others can you come up with???
Feckless Friday: Aerial Reconnaissance Challenge
What in the world?
Here is today’s hint: I originally wanted to use something topical, like Michael Jackson’s Neverland Ranch (movie coming out) or Transylvania or the Haunted House for Halloween. All of those images turned out kinda lame. So you know this image is none of those.
How’s that for a useful hint? Meh.
Can you identify this famous location using only this aerial view? The answer will be provided after the jump.
Pandora, why hast thou forsaken me?
I had quite the love affair with Pandora Internet Radio. I have to admit their Music Genome Project was pretty cool. They claimed each song in the project was analyzed “using up to 400 distinct musical characteristics.”
That meant if I started a new “station” with a song I liked, I was likely to enjoy the rest of the music they matched me up with. Last time I looked I had 63 stations, most of which I had extensively customized by rating the songs I did and didn’t like.
I admit I was a hardcore consumer of Pandora. I used it almost 40 hours a week while at work.
Yes, there was advertising, but since I kept Pandora in it’s own tab, it wasn’t too intrusive. And, to be quite honest about it, I didn’t mind the ads so much since they were built into the Pandora page and didn’t impact the listening experience at all. I understood they were a necessary evil that paid for the service I enjoyed.
A few months back, though, Pandora dropped me an email and said that they were limiting free accounts to 40 hours a month. If I wanted more, I’d have to upgrade to “Pandora One” for $36 a year, which would also take away the ads.
I thought by receiving the ads I was already “paying” for the service!
So now I listen to Pandora until it runs out, then simply dump it for the rest of the month, which means the ads targeted at unpaid users like me are stopped. I now listen to free radio through Windows Media Player where there are minimal advertisements and no time limits.
Today’s puzzle courtesy of The Terminator himself
Can you find what is so interesting about this letter? Mwuahahahahaha!
Here’s a link to the official government web site where the original PDF version of the letter can be found.